Thursday, May 29, 2008

The Image in the Looking Glass

Reading a recent post at Suburban Scrawl got me thinking. (Good job, Melisa!) Please bear with me.

Darling Daughter has gorgeous, thick, wavy hair. In my family, straight, thin, lifeless hair is the norm. Thank God Darling Daughter inherited her hair from The Hubs side of the family, maybe this 'thin hair' cycle is broken. I would LOVE to have hair like hers.

But Darling Daughter has mentioned more than once how lucky I am to have straight hair. And she just got her hair cut. Not just cut but thinned and layered. It looks very nice. But I cringed a little with each snip of the scissors, and admit I was envious of those long, thick locks that lay on the floor.

Not too long ago was I standing in the shampoo aisle at CVS, searching for a product that would give my lifeless hair some lift, some poof, some body...basically change it's nature completely. A miracle in a bottle. There was another woman in this shampoo aisle doing the same thing I was - reading each label to see what it promised. She had gorgeous thick, naturally curly hair. I felt so blah and self-conscious about my own hair just standing next to her.

We got to talking (because I am like that - I talk to EVERYONE!) and she told me she HATED her hair. She was studying each shampoo bottle to see if she could find one that would straighten her hair. Her hair was AMAZING, very Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio. I was shocked that she appeared to so hate her hair.

Why does it always seem as though the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence? Why can't we accept ourselves, embrace ourselves as we are? So often we're our own worst enemy. We would NEVER tolerate a friend (some friend!) who spoke to us in the way we speak to ourselves.

I've tried to teach Darling Daughter to love who she is. I've "used my words" but clearly I haven't enacted it. Hair is only the most recent example. My own inner voice is a real downer much of the time. I'm going to try to work on that. And hopefully set a better example for my daughter.

5 comments:

RiverPoet said...

(raising hand) Guilty of always wanting my hair to be something it's not. I have thick, curly hair that can be a little unruly now and then. I always wanted that thick, straight, lustrous hair they love to show on commercials, the kind that shines like glass.

Nope. I got this curly stuff that my mother, who had straight, fine hair, always wanted.

Yeah, we're pretty sad, aren't we?

Peace - D

Melisa Wells said...

Great post! I'm glad I got you thinking and I hope it wasn't too painful for you...HA HA HA HA Just kidding!

You're right; the grass IS always greener. Can't we all just get along...with ourselves? :)

As Cape Cod Turns said...

My curly red head wants her hair straight and my straight blonde wants her hair curly. OY.
I think I will work on my inner voice and suggest that to daughters too. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

This is how live...wanting straight when it's curly or vice versa. I think it's just the norm!

Betsy, short for Elizabeth, formally known as Esther said...

It is SO true! I want to have a less curvy figure, my sister would die for curves.