Sunday, April 13, 2008

Another telephone rant

in the
Dead Zone.

And before you go all Stephen King on me I should explain that I mean Dead Zone in the technology aspect. Specifically, cell phone signal.

(Just for the record let me state
that I do lYves me some Stephen King.)

Yes, I live in a small town in rural New England. But walk two blocks from my house to the center of the village and there's great signal strength. I make calls, send photos, text messages - I can do it all. But at my house? Nada. Bupkis. Nuttin' honey.

How is this possible? It's not like I'm in the middle of the Great Outback. (Heck, for all I know, Crocodile Dundee has a great signal. Tony, maybe you could clear that up for me?) There are two major freeways within five miles of my house, and there is full cell signal strength up and down their lengths.

It's not just Verizon, the service I use. I've had friends come over who have different carriers and they report the same problem.

What never ceases to amaze me is how there seems to be enough signal for my phone to let me know that someone has left me a voice message, but never enough to actually pick up the message.

This is beyond annoying. Not because I make so many phone calls. I've already documented my lack of affection for telephones. But it seems the rest of the world DOES have a cell signal everywhere they wander. I have found that when people always have a cell signal, they can not fathom a place on earth that doesn't have a signal.

This usually leads to a convoluted one-sided conversation of explaining that "I don't have a cell signal at my home, so if you call the cell number and leave a voicemail, but I'm home, I'm not going to get the message until the next time I leave home." Way too boring, way too much information. People zone me out long before they understand the situation. I've probably already lost YOU , dear readers reader.

The most maddening was when I was trying to set up my online Verizon account. The Verizon website said the password was being texted to my cell phone. But I don't have a signal.

After going over the paper bill with a magnifying glass I finally located a telephone number to call a real person. They said they would text me the password. I told them I have no signal, couldn't they just email it to me? No, if not a text message it would have to go in the snail mail and I could expect to receive it within two weeks. TWO WEEKS.

I told them to text it to me. Then I grabbed my cell phone and ran up the street to the corner - got a signal, message came in, ran back to my house, entered the password at their website...and it said too much time had elapsed between time texted to cell and time entered on computer!! ARGH!

I had to repeat this sequence THREE TIMES before I managed to get back to the house and get it entered in the alotted time.

I really do need more exercise, and I admit I have a hard time finding the motivation for it. Now I'm thinking that if Verizon forced me to change my password twice a day I'd be in pretty good shape by the end of the year.


Momma said...

Hey Kathy -

I have a Sunday Soapbox post up on my site. Seems like we both needed to rant today, but for different things.

Have you thought of asking the Verizon guys to send out the little man from the ad who says, "Can you hear me now?" Maybe that would get their attention.


Don Mills Diva said...

Wow - that's crazy - good thing you have a home phone.

You do have a home phone right?

noble pig said...

There is only one place in my house that my cell phone works I HATE IT. It's a strange, strange phenomenon that I have had to stop trying to figure out.

MoziEsmé said...

I can so relate! Here in Mozambique I have cell phone access everywhere (which is good since we don't have a land line . . .).

But back in Roseburg OR, we didn't have cell phone reception at home, and I went through the same explanations to people with blank expressions, only to miss important messages because they were left at home while I was in town or on my cell while I was home.

Tee said...

This drives me CRAZY!!! We don't have good cell phone receiptions at home, so for that reason I NEVER give my cell phone number to anyone, it's too hard to explain. My husband's cell phone didn't work in the next county over, but we could call around the world with it. Now explain that one to me. I feel your pain. Technology, in general, gives me heartburn.

Susan said...

Your running to the corner and back is hysterical! Why can't things be easier?

Anonymous said...

hey girl, there's cell phone boosters around. Go into a cell phone store and see if you can buy one. They're meant for within a home, but I can't imagine it wouldn't work in you situation.

love you! julie